On her most recent album released late last year. I have read countless of reviews on this & sampled some of the offerings. These are the ones that made a more profound impression on me, so I’m going to chip in my 2 cents, with references from some enlightening sources, of course.

The Tracks:

Blue Bird – one of the few pop genre upbeat songs featured on the album. It’s got a catchy tune complementing Ayu’s uplifting vocals. I find it terribly addictive; makes me just wanna groove to the rhythm. Saw her performing the song as the final encore on her Best of Countdown Live 2006-2007 DVD (came with A Best2 – White-); loved it instantly, been humming in my head ever since. Definitely one of her best summer songs to date, in my point of view.

Until that day – A song that portrays her way of life: the struggles throughout & the ideals. It falls under the rock-trance hybrid genre with edgy & powerful vocal renditions from Ayu. Listening to it for the first time literally got me jumping on my seats; this song really rawks!

JEWEL – A find this one a beautifully penned poignant ballad with simple yet touching meaning; telling the story of a wounded heart learning to love by being loved & is consequently touched & wishes to treasure her loved one.

“I wasn’t sad at all, but the reason my eyes brimmed with tears
was because you seeped through the scar of my heart
and turned it into such a tenderness, that it hurt to think of you”

Saw the MV, a stunning display of glitterati set in a frozen winter field with flowers, snow, butterflies, trees in an everything jewel-ized state. Not to mention intricate jewelry-studded gowns that looked like they carried the whole collection of Van Cleef & Arpels. No wonder it reportedly costs 100 million yen to make.

Momentum – another of my favorite, an emotional ballad with rock elements reminiscent of her earlier masterpiece M – a style uniquely & distinctively Ayu that I really dig.

Starting off with soft orchestral instrumentals & transitioning to a powerful emotional piece when the chorus breaks in, I personally find it heavenly sounding. It speaks about the contradicting feelings of a person wishing to let go of the past but could not bear to part with her precious memories.

I have yet to view the full version of the MV, which contains a very poignant plot & artistic symbolism:

Relating the tale of a girl who died in the past, but is still unable to let go of her love for a man, who has now grown old. To her loving him was her first & last miracle, which she holds onto as her last hope. Thus, she stands out in the cold snowy days by a lamp post, hoping the meet him again. The lamp post scene is symbolical of the candle; there is a myth that a dark cellar exists with candles & everyone is connected with a lighted candle. Once the candle has burnt out of has been accidentally extinguished, the person connected to it dies. The guarding of these candles is Death, who seems to give her another chance by using her own candle’s flame to light up her extinguished ones. She briefly returns as a spirit, in time to see her past lover lay flowers at the spot where she died. In the end, a gust of wind extinguishes the candle before she can reunite with her lover for the last time.

Another tragic love song.

Secret – the defining song of the album. A very Chinese sounding emotional ballad; it’s the ending theme song for a HK movie, Confession of Pain starring Takeshi Kaneshiro. Haven’t seen or heard about the movie yet, I thought it sounded like one of those Cantonese flicks with plot along the lines of the Internal Affairs sort.
"Even now, I am as always
Searching for a place to be
There is nothing else I’d rather have"
Though, I still find it rather plain, despite its poetic & poignant lyrics.

1 LOVE – one of the highly acclaimed pure-rock genre track on the album - Loud & powerful sounding with raw & unpolished vocals. The lyrics relate the story of an outlaw girl being a fighter, paving her own way in her life without following anyone. However she relies on love, where she finds solace and is the only thing she needs in her life. Impressed by the vocals but the tunes have yet to grow on me. I really liked the gothic-grunge theme MV, though. It potrayed a dehumanizing theme, where people are treated like mere commodities to be sold for the whims of the rich. In the MV, Ayu appears as a sexy pole dancer being auctioned at a human market by a secret society of the elite. She throws money in the air, as a sign of independence showing that money is not everything to her.

I’ve been a fan since her debut in 1998, back when she was the timid little girl with a squeaky voice & little self confidence. There’s something about her style & persona – her feelings & attitude, in which she manage to convey in her music; so raw & emotional, simple yet meaningful & touching is appealing to me. Feelings of anger, despair, regret, resignation, fear, pain, loneliness, forgiveness, hope & love poignantly penned & sung are ones that I connect & hold on to in everyday life & struggles. There are expressions of my inner self, feelings that my heart wishes to convey but could never find the words for to voice out. Perhaps I felt the connection in the sense that, we are always searching for a place to be, seeking for the one thing that matters most in life, the only one that we could find solace in.

Over the years, her music, vocals & writings have evolved, grown mature & refined; though I have missed her recent couple of music years, as I felt they’ve somewhat lacked the charm of her earlier masterpieces. However, a trip to the music record capital of Kuching – Kenyalang Park got me picking up one of her latest compilation & boy, was I intoxicated, again. Love her or hate her, this is definitely not everyone’s cup of tea. It does not matter if she is no longer as popular as she once was; I still dig her style & enjoy her music just the same.

My Impression: Fairly impressed to say the least. I can’t wait to get my hands on Secret. Though spending 150 bucks on records in a month is not reflective of a sound budget; especially during cash-strapped times like these. I’m going to get it anyway.

Sources:

http://www.channel-ai.com/blog/2007/02/14/secret/

http://ayumi.primenova.com/lyrics.php